Frightened

I cut my finger ytd. When I open a can, I accidentally cut my finger by using the sharp edge of the can. The blood came out immediately. It is a very deep cut. It bleeds alot. Im scared. Immediately I called my dad. I cant connect to him. I called my mum. She din pick up her phone. The 3rd person was YY. I think back about our conversation ytd. It was kinda funny. I was crying terribly due to need of help by outsiders and also cz of I got frightened. I never face this kind of situation alone b4. So, in the call, I told him that I injured my finger and it bleeds alot. I told him I am alone at home. He told me to shut off all my doors and windows. Im like... Huh? Lol he din heard that I said I injured my finger and bleeds alot. Lol.. he tot I am scared cz I am alone at home. Lol.. So after he knew the whole situation and after I am stable in emotion, my injures clothed. So, I am kinda relief n chill that time. Basically, I am very chill that time. I start asking him to treat my wound. Lol.. I cant believe I am chill until that level too. Lol.. Im impressed by myself.. Lol.. In the end, this injury really brings me experience and damn a lot of pain. It bleeds again this morning. The pain is continuously non-stop. I cant even stretch my finger a little. I stop using the whole left hand to prevent more pain and bleed situation. Hope it will recover very soon.

Angel [ 2.58pm 18th December 2010 ]

Exam is OVER!!!

Hooray!! I just finished exam. Tot will go out with classmates but it dosen go that way. Frauline and KC they all went to The Curve. I din join them but blogging here. Lol they din invite I also duwan to be so 'thick face'. Hope they will enjoy their night. I finished my last paper T5- Managing People and System. I have no prob with the paper but in real life I guess Im facing prob in managing people? This is kinda sad. I still feel distance between me n my classmates. Mayb cz of I din really join them in outings and occasion? I think 1 of the reason shld be my emotional feeling. Really gotta find out whats the prob le. Sad n sorrow is surrounding me. They din leave me since last friday, after the last outing with my Ausmat friends. Continuous 7 days of crying due to too much of things which changing my life. (I hope 2day wont be the 8th day?) My life is totally changed in these 7 days. Oh no.. Im having tears now.. Dun come out from my eyes pls.. ok ok.. Lets talk abt how is my life now. Life without a brother anymore, without true happiness, with ignorance by frens, with tears. I describe myself as an orphan now. I duno what kind of life is this but I know this isn't the life I want. What did I did wrongly until I deserve a life like this? Is it really my fault? I give up.. I started give up on many things. I dun hope anymore. I give up on love, give up on relationship. Im tired of all this. I shld just let go of all this,I guess my life will be easier after that? Ya.. I shld just let it be.. If there is no hope, there will be no disappointment. If there is no disappointment, there will be no sad n sorrow. Life can be easier? I just want a happy life. Just Happy.... When will I get it?

Angel [ 6.20pm 10th December 2010]

我失去了人生中最重要的人，同时多了个好朋友

他一直都是我的精神支柱，我最重要的人。我给了他一个选择的机会，让他脱离我这个刁蛮又霸道的妹妹。果然，如我所猜测的，他选择了当回好朋友。心很痛，撕裂般的痛，比三年前失去的更痛。我以为我会没事，但不如我想象的。现在很痛苦，真的很痛。看到你传来那决定性的短讯，我当场大哭，我控制不住。这是我给你的选择，当然我也应该尊重你的决定。谢谢你曾给我的一切，谢谢你曾爱过我这个妹妹。你给我的一切都是美好的。我真的很爱很爱你这个哥哥。以后的我们会是很好的朋友，对吧？

爱你的妹妹：

颖莹 [傍晚4.20分 2010年12月五日]

The Day after Tomorrow

I wonder what will happen to me 2day. A group of friends are leaving in the sense of we are not in the same college anymore. Everyone go their own path of life. Ausmat gang - Wee Kah, Leo, Bernard, Edwin, Dexter, Yit Kenn, Lam, Gason, Jengho, Vee Jie, Sai Hoo, James, Kelvin, Kutai, Wilson(Ah Bo), Yong Jun, Hwa Tong... Will miss u guys.. All the best in life and I am sure we will meet each other 1 day. Im looking forward to that day. =) Thanks for giving me such wonderful memories which I will remember always and It will be in my deep deep heart. U guys are such good friends which I cant use any word to describe. I were always happy staying with u guys. So glad to have u guys part of my life. Of course there is 1 person which I cant forget - My Gor YY. He is the 1 that connected me and n u guys. If there is no him, we wouldn't know each other. He is alo leaving with u guys. Same thing, I duno when will see him and also u guys again. Just hope that day will come soon. =) Once again, all the best in life and u guys are in my deep heart.

Lots of Love,

Angel [2.35pm 3th December 2010]